The Edge of Eternity

It was impossible to worry there.

It was silent, reverent. There were people, but no chattering, no frivolity. It was rather like the time two friends and I traveled to Germany to visit the silent guru Mother Meera. The silence was so thick you could swim through it.

Daughter Darling, Baby Boy Darling and I were visiting Pu’uhonua o Honaunau, “The City of Refuge.”

There were maybe 50 people there, yet we hardly noticed each other. People moved quietly around the huts noticing the tiki’s who guarded this sacred place, and people stopped to look out to sea. Occasionally one would turn around to honor the mountain behind us. The sea roared its continual sounding of life. Brilliant yellow tangs (fishes) dotted the tidal zone and an occasional sea turtle waved a flipper giving us a high-five.

We had read of this place is called “The Crossroads of the Universe.” If you are able to travel physically to the Edge of Eternity, it would be there at the City of Refuge. It is located 20 miles or so south of Kailua-Kona. Some believe this is an energy vortex for those who have not been able to get out of their own “soup.” Supposedly there are two distinct entities there who are guardians of this sacred spot. There are tall spirits, and little ones likened to menehunes. We saw no spirits; neither did we see the “excited” tiki that according to Pila of Hawaii if he offends you you are beyond repair. He is a symbol that once one’s “housecleaning “is over, the zest for life returns. We were wondering if he was censored by someone beyond repair.

Baby Darling played in the sand, and later waded in the crystalline waters of the sand-lined bay. We were there for a few hours, just there, being at-one-with the area, feeling peaceful, getting out of our own skin. The temperature was perfect. The blustery wind we had experienced not 30 miles away at a gas station was non-existent. The sky was overcast. We stood barefooted on Pele’s pahoehoe (smooth lava) for it is said that standing there will cause things you need to resolve to bubble to the surface.

As we stood looking out to sea the couple next to us pointed. “Dolphins.” A pod of dolphins swam off shore; occasionally one would curve its beautiful body in that gentle arc of dolphins and show his blue-silver hide. We watched as they continued their journey down the shore-line. And then before they drifted from our sight one gave us an aerial display, leaping from the water in a joyful acrobatic flip. “Goodbye, goodbye,” said the dolphin, “Good bye, good bye. You can be free too. You can be innocent and care-free as us.”

The City of Refuge still contains a massive stone wall built in 1550 that separates the royal grounds from the pu’uhonua, the sanctuary. Fallen warriors or individuals who had broken some taboo and were sentenced to death could, if they manage to make it to this place, be forgiven and return home to their families. It was a place of a second chance. No blood was to be shed within its confines.

We planned to stay until sunset for we heard that is the time of greatest healing, but as we sat there, we suddenly felt complete—it was time to go. So we left as the glow of Ra lighted the overcast sky and the ball of the sun remained hidden in clouds.

We drove the 20 or so miles to Kona, and as we got out to go to dinner, the ball of the sun was there hanging orange over the palms, and people stopped alongside the road. Some sat on the little rock wall alongside the road watching the setting sun and taking pictures. We watched until it was down, and commented to each other that this was a “happening” place. Because of our location on the south side of the island, we never see a sunset. The area felt enlivened. Music wafted on the breeze, and we sat overlooking the endlessly pounding sea while we dined at Forest Gumps Restaurant.

Perhaps if we had moved to the Kona side of the island we would want to stay on the island, but we are glad we didn’t for we believe our destiny lies someplace else.

On the Big Island you are on special ground. You are at standing at a doorway in your reality where even the Earth itself liquefies and nothing is as it may seem. Says, Pila of Hawaii, “That is the reason I feel it is paramount for individuals to come here and experience the energy in person at least one time.”

Many people find their direction just by coming to the Big Island.

No wonder it “calls” people.

The Distant Conch Sounds—it is calling the soul.

“In the middle of the ocean where East meets west is the Island of Fire and Ice, home of the volcano and doorway to another dimension and a different reality. Here magic lives, where the Earth itself liquefies and nothing is quite as it seems.”  --Pila of Hawaii


One day while on a wild goose chase—looking for a solar store—the four of us ended up on a remote tip of the island called South Point.

It was desolate and windy and one poor girl had driven off the road. There she sat; her car’s axial stuck on a lava rock leaving the car floundering. We couldn’t push her off that rock, and she had already—with the magic of cell phones—called someone, so apparently she was okay. DD and I, however, wanted the heck out of there.

Fascinating, last night I read that South Point, the Southern-most tip of the United States is a so-called energy vortex. Because of the lava tubes and the iron columns found in them, they interfere with navigational instruments. The Space Shuttle’s engineers know this, and use that area as a set-point for their instruments.

And then I read that a lady living at South Point saw a UFO fly, in a great column of water, straight out of the ocean and aim for parts unknown. The lady went into her bedroom, packed her bags, and moved off the island.

My hair has stood as high as limp hair can stand on more than one occasion as I was reading the Secrets and Mysteries of Hawaii. A call to the soul by Pila of Hawaii

People say, “I don’t know what I’m doing here, I just had to come.” Or “something called me.”

That’s what we said when we came here, that we were “Called.” Legend says that Pele’s job is to bring emotions to the surface. You who have read my blog know that in the early days of life on the island I likened our journey to an EST training. Anxieties, fears, worries, aggravations, irritations, all, like lave oozing from the volcano bubbled to the surface to be healed.

Some call the Big Island the Dirty Laundry Island. Perhaps what we were feeling was the swish swish of our dirty socks sloshing is water straight from Mauna Kea’s ice melt. People are being processed. Some are living Aloha; some are resigned to a life of struggle, or just resigned under the guise of “living in Paradise.”

Some have encountered their souls and in the process have recognized their destiny.

And now, what have I learned?

It is simple. Our job is to live our dream. It isn’t to change the world, heal anybody, or work on being enlightened. It is to live our dream and to encourage others to do the same.

"The idea isn't to arrive at the end of your life with a perfectly preserved body, but to slide into it chocolate in one hand, wine in the other yelling, 'Whoopie! What a ride!'"
(sign in a bathroom)

"Don't try, do."

I did it. I sent my manuscript off. We’ll see what happens.

I titled it Letters, A Mother’s Secret, A Daughter’s Secret.

The format of the book is my mother’s letters, and I responded by writing letters back to her. She wrote the letters between the years of 1956 and 1967 to the Holt Adoption Agency. They were heartfelt, chatty, first they were a sort of application to adopt, and after the children came, it was about the little things children do, and how precious they were to her. She had a sounding board in Grandma Holt. I am amazed the agency kept the letters and sent them to my step-dad, and that eventually they found me.

Before computers and emails and all the blogging and twittering and whatever that people do now, letters were the primary means of communication. I consider it to be a miracle that they survived and found me. Perhaps I am entering into the Hawaiian way, that there is no separation between us and our ancestors.

Mom had a secret in that I was a love-child. I had a secret as well, and finally telling her, even years after her death, was liberating.

Speaking of children…here on the home front we will soon have to call Baby Darling (BD) Little Boy Darling for he is growing so fast we believe he is taller in the morning than he was the night before. And he uses sign language we didn’t teach him. He invented it. Button, he loves buttons, pushing the elevator button, the washing machine button, Grandpa’s computer buttons especially, and even button’s on shirts. The sign is his pointer finger pressed in the palm of his other hand. At night he graces us with a high-five and a hug before bed. What happens to the time and the years?

Until last week BD basically went barefooted. Last week DD put little surf shoes on him and walking down our road those shoes did the driving. He had to run—it was more like a stagger—to keep up with them. DD said, “When did I put drunken shoes on you?” This week he has shoes mastered.

                                                       These shoes are meant for walking

Last weekend Husband Dear and I took out the toilet, placed ceramic tiles under its space, and ran off to Hawaii to allow tiles to dry. I had painted the brown wooden walls of the bathroom aqua, and we are putting down white tiles on the floor. The toilet is back in, but Lordy, we haven’t completed the rest of the floor. Putting down 4 x 4 tiles is worse than cleaning the refrigerator, mowing the yard and a few other things thrown in. You have to get down onto the floor! Oh, yes, and up again.

DD and I have decided that Hawaii is a catalyst; it catapults you to the next great thing. I was reading that Hawaii is a “Hot Spot,” an area on the planet where consciousness rages. Do you know what I mean? It is a place where energies collect, and amplify one’s connection to the divine, one’s inner consciousness, Intuition, God, whatever one wishes to call it.

Some think Sedona Arizona is one such place. A friend told me that the Grandfathers will chase you away from Sedona, now I wonder about Hawaii. Perhaps the Grandmothers are chasing us away, saying, “Don’t sit here, go out, do, fulfill your dreams.”

We’re trying.

What is it Yoda said? “Don’t try, do.”